I've been meaning to write a post this past week to share a few thoughts about freedom and our current state. I wanted to raise questions about whether we, as humans, can ever be really free? Do we, as a collective, really want to? And then, out of nowhere (obviously not for him), Nour Merheb, a Lebanese human rights activist kills himself. Last year, Nour had been sentenced by the Military Tribunal in Lebanon to three months in prison because he refused to pay a court-ordered fine in an assault case, in which he was the victim of a beating by an off-duty army soldier. His story in full and his struggle for justice can be found on his website.
Now it is extremely difficult to believe that there was no connection between his suicide and the sentence that he may, at some point, have had to serve. But the suicide note he left (via a video recording) leaves me a little baffled. Here are some excerpts:
Now it is extremely difficult to believe that there was no connection between his suicide and the sentence that he may, at some point, have had to serve. But the suicide note he left (via a video recording) leaves me a little baffled. Here are some excerpts:
I'm sending this message to explain what i did and ask you to stand up for your and my rights.
I discovered that life is a prison. we are not free. we don't have a choice. Not even to eat, drink, feel or not!
I also discovered that life has a purpose: for us to breed! to transfer our gene.
However, i also discovered that there is one status of which we can be free. Really free. The state of not being.
I'm not depressed. I'm perfectly sane. i don't take any kind of drugs. I have regular and frequent sex. i eat well. i work a lot :D lol! i achieved many things in my life... i loved and got loved...
I just decided to break free!"
In his note, he does mention that he'd been preparing for this day for 3 years, i.e. the year he was assaulted. But his note points to a broader outlook. He seems to indicate that his journey and fight has taught him that we have no choice in life, that whether he was in a real prison or not, life itself kept us locked up. I don't know what he means by that. Are we prisoners of our own bodies (hence the reference to food, drink and procreation)? Or is he saying something else? That however hard we fight, we will never be free of the shackles we have created for ourselves. That the system is much stronger than any of us.
I wonder though. If Nour was not sentenced to prison, if he had won that fight, would he have gone through with this? Had he given up on life long ago? For our sake, I hope not.
All I can say is, RIP Nour. You have touched us all. I hope your family and friends respect your wishes to be cremated. But I also hope you're wrong...
7 comments:
Good post, Lama. A very sad story... I'm ashamed to have not heard about him or his story until now. Thanks for that... About your last statement, while I too wish he were not right, I think the choices we seem to have are the result of chains of events anticipating, giving rise to, or maximizing/minimizing the probability of occurrence of subsequent events and responses... so it's not a simple case of fatalism, but not as lovely as a free willing agency would have been.
It's a sad story and may he rest in peace but though he may have felt that he was of sound mind, he clearly was not. If all human beings, faced with the meaninglessness of their existence and lack of freedom, killed themselves, I fear it would be a very empty planet. I think his life would have meant more had he struggled against forces that limit freedom, rather than decide that nothingness was more empowering.
Nour was taken as a hostage by a group of people, that gave him a brain wash and led him to this end.
If, and at any stage, Nour kept the faith of believing in God, he would never have done this.
I knew Nour since he was a kid, a loving, a caring and a very pleasant baby, I would never imagined that one day he would do this.
Let's be aware of those groups, who sold themselves to devil, and they are taking our young, clever and kind hearts people from us.
Time to do something, and to stop this Evil thing forever!!
I truly respect Nour's Ideas and Opinions. He is one of many devoted and pure hearted activists. Although, if Nour were thinking clearly he would have kept fighting instead of freeing himself and leaving this world noting but confused and ignorant as ever.
I believe that Nour got really tired, trying to fight in this shallow war. He was yelling for rights that shouldn't have been taken away in the first place. He killed himself, to free his soul, to get away from those savages we call humans. I hope he's enjoying himself wherever he is. See you someday Nour.
For the anonymous who claims to know Nour and who claims that he was taken hostage and brainwashed i say: wake up and get back to earth before we start to believe u're not only a liar but sick too and need urgent treatment.
Nour was a very special person with a truly beautiful heart. And he will always have a dear spot in the hearts of those who truly loved him. Nour was very smart and very sensitive, but also troubled. He had been scarred by some very jarring experiences when he was very young, leaving him with deep psychological pain. [Pls read his note, ALL Big Fires Start with a Little One, on "For Nour Merheb, our brother and friend" Facebook page to understand the pain he went through]. The thing is a person only commits suicide if the psychological pain he is feeling becomes much stronger and bigger than the coping mechanisms he had. But there are ways to ease the pain and they have nothing to do with killing oneself. I wish he had realized that.
His suicide has nothing to do with freedom, philosophical thought, or feeling disenfranchised with the world-- things many people experience. Even HE did not say in his final letter [or while he was alive] that he was killing himself because of human rights. He wanted to set himself free [from the pain] he felt and the emptiness that possessed him. During his life, he would often say "I'm tired" "I don't want to keep on living," "I feel empty, numb." A number of his close friends tried hard and with determination to try to change his mind, and "save him" so-to-speak from his morbid and fatal plan; but we all failed, because he did not want to be saved. I think he really needed to rest. And I hope he has found the peace he was looking for.
We all loved Nour a lot, but I wish he loved himself a bit more so as not to obliterate his beautiful soul [I don't mean it in the spiritual sense, not to offend Nour ;) ]
If we want to argue about his decision from a philosophical perspective, I would argue that while he made his decision consciously, he did not make it freely. Because he was trapped by his own psychological pain and he was a prisoner of his own painful reality that he felt he had no choice but to obliterate himself in order to end his internal suffering. That's why I urge you all not to say that he was "the free one" and we are "the dead ones," especially since we have the responsibility, particularly on Facebook-- a public space-- not to influence other young people who might be going through rough times and having suicidal thoughts. There are other ways to overcome pain, and therapy is definitely an effective method.
Another point I would like to put out there is that a humanist and a defender of human rights can never support the right to commit suicide, because in order to do so effectively and logically, he would have to be willing to apply it universally. [It's not called the Universal Declaration of Human Rights for nothing.] But where would that leave us if we applied the right to suicide universally!??
Life is tough with its bitter and sweet moments. But every experience, even painful ones, like Nour's suicide, helps us become better people with greater awareness and more humanity -- if we wish to. I hope that's what we will all do with this terrible loss.
I love you Nour and miss you. I wish you had stuck around just a bit longer.
Nour was a very special person with a truly beautiful heart. And he will always have a dear spot in the hearts of those who truly loved him. Nour was very smart and very sensitive, but also troubled. He had been scarred by some very jarring experiences when he was very young, leaving him with deep psychological pain. [Pls read his note, ALL Big Fires Start with a Little One, on "For Nour Merheb, our brother and friend" Facebook page to understand the pain he went through]. The thing is a person only commits suicide if the psychological pain he is feeling becomes much stronger and bigger than the coping mechanisms he had. But there are ways to ease the pain and they have nothing to do with killing oneself. I wish he had realized that.
His suicide has nothing to do with freedom, philosophical thought, or feeling disenfranchised with the world-- things many people experience. Even HE did not say in his final letter [or while he was alive] that he was killing himself because of human rights. He wanted to set himself free [from the pain] he felt and the emptiness that possessed him. During his life, he would often say "I'm tired" "I don't want to keep on living," "I feel empty, numb." A number of his close friends tried hard and with determination to try to change his mind, and "save him" so-to-speak from his morbid and fatal plan; but we all failed, because he did not want to be saved. I think he really needed to rest. And I hope he has found the peace he was looking for.
We all loved Nour a lot, but I wish he loved himself a bit more so as not to obliterate his beautiful soul [I don't mean it in the spiritual sense, not to offend Nour ;) ]
If we want to argue about his decision from a philosophical perspective, I would argue that while he made his decision consciously, he did not make it freely. Because he was trapped by his own psychological pain and he was a prisoner of his own painful reality that he felt he had no choice but to obliterate himself in order to end his internal suffering. That's why I urge you all not to say that he was "the free one" and we are "the dead ones," especially since we have the responsibility, particularly on Facebook-- a public space-- not to influence other young people who might be going through rough times and having suicidal thoughts. There are other ways to overcome pain, and therapy is definitely an effective method.
Another point I would like to put out there is that a humanist and a defender of human rights can never support the right to commit suicide, because in order to do so effectively and logically, he would have to be willing to apply it universally. [It's not called the Universal Declaration of Human Rights for nothing.] But where would that leave us if we applied the right to suicide universally!??
Life is tough with its bitter and sweet moments. But every experience, even painful ones, like Nour's suicide, helps us become better people with greater awareness and more humanity -- if we wish to. I hope that's what we will all do with this terrible loss.
I wish he had stuck around just a bit longer.
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